Note from Islam to Pope Benedict

How dare you call us violent and unreasonable!

Lost Sea

Went to the Lost Sea today, and it wasn't a disaster. Just let the kids know the rules of storytelling. Like, don't do it. And the rules of Loudly Exclaiming too. And I made sure they understood what a pertinent question was. This is a moonshine still. I didn't have to visit it today.
This is called the Devil's Hole. It's just a hole with a red light in it. But they say it's pretty scary when the maintanance man changes the bulb without warning. Supposedly a lady looked in there at the wrong time and thought she saw the devil, but it was some homely maintanance man who quit his job after the jolt to his self-esteem. I take these Tennessee cave stories with a grain of salt.



This is a thing whose name I can't remember, but in the Civil War soldiers would fill it with bat guano. After a process a liquid called "mother's liquor" would come out. They would take this substance outside and add a few more ingredients and boil it until it crystallized into gunpowder. We won't be doing this recipe at home. Well, unless Dad figures out how it's done. He'll definitely want to try it.

We also visited the glass blower's shop, and walked the nature trail. Josie got a necklace with a glass eagle pendant. Jake got a color changing pencil.

Mayan Corn Day

Here's our corn casserole.

The kids made it.

Recipe:
1/2 cup butter melted
2 eggs, beaten
1 box jiffy corn bread mix
1 can corn
1 can creamed corn
1 cup sour cream

Mix it up, put it in a greased 9x9 baking dish and cook it for 45 minutes at 350 or until the top is golden brown.

It's that corn casserole people often eat at Thanksgiving because it's just too dang fattening to enjoy more often.

Wouldn't It Be Good

I was 11 when this song came out. Still, I had healthy little crushes on the right pop stars. No Nick Rhodes for me. John Taylor (Duran Duran) and Nick Kershaw (especially when he was in that video with the static suit, and not dancing around on British Solid Gold.) And I always thought, "Yes! It would be good if you were on my side. Even if it was for just a day." Still love this song.

Wouldn't it be good if I could post this video on my actual web page? Been trying for too long to set up an account on YouTube.

Sabre Toothed Tigers and Revisionist History

This is Josie's saber toothed tiger. Eating a reasonable sized rodent. Pretty bloody. We learned that the proper name for this cat is smilodon.


This is Jake's saber-toothed tiger. He's the one in the back. The guys in the front are the "freaky rodents" that supposedly lived during prehistoric times. The kids thought that the saber toothed tiger probably ate these freaky rodents. They had to be some mighty big rodents for the tiger to need such enormous teeth to take them down.

Parade of Dead Bugs

Well, she's not dead yet. Actually, Josie is really pretty good at keeping predatory bugs alive since she really enjoys seeing them eat. It's the cricket in the foreground that will meet its fate today. Josie named the mantis Madison, naturally. She thinks it already ate its mate.

I should set her up a little bug coliseum, start giving all her little creatures Roman names. We can call this praying mantis Ceasar Manticus. The cricket can be Saul Goldstein.

What Was I Doing?

I was putting one chocolate fudge pop-tart in the right side of my toaster. It sat right beneath the radio. Josie was walking around the kitchen table doing three year old things. My mother called right when she saw it on TV. When I turned on my own TV, I remember thinking a helicopter had crashed into that building. I had no clue of the enormity of the World Trade Center. Certainly it wasn't a passenger plane. Well, I had to get off the phone at some point and get Jake fed too. He still needed help with that. He had just turned two six days before the whole world changed.

I wasn't watching TV when the second tower hit, although I'm sure I was trying to get back to it. My mom called me again to let me know. Then I thought "Oh my God, my kids are going to see WWIII." I never expected one of them to fall. I was on the phone with my closest friend when that happened. Then I really didn't think the second one would fall. And it did that while I was watching alone. Somewhere in there the Pentagon was hit, and I called Ray.

Josie wanted to watch Blue's Clues of course. I remember thinking "Blue's Clues" couldn't be on right now, or if it was there would be some sort of ticker on the bottom of the screen with updates.

I remember that day very well. Shock is like a camera flash for me. Things stand still and imprint on your brain.

I've changed a lot since that day. I know a lot more about Islam than I ever thought I would care to know. I also operate on the belief that terrible things will happen rather than won't, and more often than not these things can be traced to radical Islam. It's not paranoia, it's just common sense and hindsight. September 11th prepared me for what happened in Beslan in 2003. I admit I'm still digesting what's happening in Darfur. The misery is so big you have to travel to outer space to see it all, and once you get out there you can't see the individual people anymore. It's hard to connect. Am I making sense?

I also know when the media is avoiding the issue and I make it a point to be informed. Like in the case of the college student who blew himself up in Oklahoma. I wasn't surprised that it happened. I'm not surprised that many have forgotten that it happened, and I'm certainly not surprised that he is still not considered a suicide bomber. Just a suicide. That's the media.

I've stopped waking my husband up every time I read something showcasing the rampant idiocy, apathy, and hypocrisy that swarms around us. It's not news to me anymore.

I do have a deeper love for regular people than I ever did before. Some of that comes from what I saw in the days following the terrorist attacks, some of it is just the way I'm wired. Regular people don't seek martyrdom, or burn effigies of American presidents, or insult victims of terrorism. They don't carry offensive signs at the funerals of fallen soldiers, or spew filth at people with whom they disagree. Sometimes if I spend too long on the internet, I start believing that regular people are very rare. That's when I call my friends and laugh and get my priorities straight. All the pain in the world that I see just makes me hug my children tighter, and appreciate my family more. I know that's really all I can do. Be that regular person that helps keep it all together, when forces around us are trying to get us unglued.

No, We're Not Selling the House

I remember when I was in college a male friend of mine called me Polly Homemaker. It seemed to stick in my head for some reason. I guess the first reason it stuck was because he said it in a way that made me know it wasn't really a compliment. Of course I wanted marriage and family and all that, anyone that knew me at the time knew that too. My high school senior prediction was that I would have two kids and have taken them on a world tour with me by the the time our ten year reunion came around. It was actually a pretty controversial prediction, but the students convinced the teacher in charge that I would definitely consider it an accurate and positive one. But there is one very good reason that the name "Polly Homemaker" does not suit me. It's the "Homemaker" part. See, my good college buddy had never really looked at my kitchen sink, or peered into my closet, or noticed that the chocolate brown carpet in my apartment appeared to be jumping. I have gotten quite a bit better over the years, and have also decided that Polly Homemaker is not a name to be ashamed of.

Today I discovered Flylady. It's a Yahoo group. She sends us daily advice that after 28 days will help your be a more organized domestic executive : ) Today she told me how to clean and shine the sink. That was my only assignment. Well, the sink looked so pretty, I wanted my counters to look pretty too. Then the floor. Then the stovetop. My kids even got a good bath tonight.

Maybe at the end of this whole experiment I won't feel like I have to laminate my children.

Seven Years Old Today

You were a week old in this picture. We took the little mask off of your face and snapped this photo. They let me take you home the next day.

It's a bouncing baby squirrel!

Our little squirrel's all grown up, with two babies of her own! She poked her head out of her house this evening and we all were staring at her when another head popped out. Then another! Then she got out on the top of the house below and dragged one of her babies out and carried him in her mouth, and jumped with him into the trees. The other one waited in the house with his head poking out. I'll see if I can get any pictures in the coming days.

School on an Angry Planet

This is school for many children on the autism spectrum.

Imagine being in a world where the gravity isn't right. Somedays you can't make out whether your feet are on the ground. The clothes in this world feel like sandpaper, but sometimes if you wear them tight enough, you can be relatively comfortable. Sometimes you make mistakes on this strange planet because the culture doesn't make sense to you. The life forms you meet think that since you look like them, and seem to come from the same place that you should act like them as well. I mean you don't actually bang your head or anything, and you say smart stuff that they seem to understand. But sometimes you stand too close, or talk too long, or move around in a way that seems strange to them.

You are told that you must play with them. Play with as many of them as possible, even if you feel safer alone. It's called mainstreaming. It's very important to the educational establishment on this planet. But when you play, they touch you when you don't expect it, with their sandpaper hands. Maybe if you make the rules, you would know what to expect. Then they call you bossy. And that you stand too close. Or say funny things. The other kids don't want to play with you anymore.

Some of them tease you. They tell you it's okay to take your pants off in public, because they can tell that you don't know the rules. You do what they say, you're supposed to play with them after all. Then everyone laughs and you think you're the life of the party, for a brief time.

Everyones laughs too loud. They talk too loud. The lights are even loud. Everyone runs around with bullhorns and it hurts your ears when they speak. Sometimes when they get angry with you (and it happens a lot but you don't know why) they get even louder and then you think they might kill you. Especially when you do things like hit someone for making you hurt, or taking your pants off in the cafeteria. You really believe they might kill you. Sometimes people have said "I could just kill you". Then when they grab you with their sandpaper hands, it really hurts. And the world swirls around you. And you feel sick. And you have no control, and you feel so afraid, because on this strange planet when you get upset and you don't understand, you get that fight or flight feeling and it's so hard to make it stop.

On this planet when you feel like people are going to kill you, you are supposed to stay calm. But it's really hard. It's like someone is pushing your head under the water and they can't hear you struggle and scream. You don't know if they will ever let you go, you need to breathe, you are drowning. Calm down. Don't panic. Other kids are swimming. You might scare them if you scream and fight.

Sometimes these grown-ups at school sound very calm when they are angry. Sometimes they get very loud when they are happy. You can't tell when people are being nice anymore. You kind of have your mom and dad figured out. And your home feels very safe. You're not an alien there. But here, it's hard to know when they are really trying to hurt you. So sometimes you try to defend yourself. Maybe grab a paddle, or push somebody, or try to run. Sometimes they catch you. Sometimes they cuff you. Sometimes they put you in jail for kids.

They don't find you a safe, private place to go to get used to this planet before immersing you in it. They won't give you time to learn the language before they expected you to speak it. They don't take the great amount of time that is needed to teach you the rules before they charge you with breaking them. They never ask you if you like being hugged before they do it. You're just supposed to like being hugged around here. They never take the time to find out that pushing you into a corner makes you feel like you're in a cage and that you have to fight and escape. They do this a lot.

They say you have no respect for authority. So they don't really want to help you. Well, not until the paperwork comes in and says that you are officially from another planet. It has to be a planet that is in their solar system. Then they have rules about how to treat your species.

Most of the time you are the only person from your planet. Your planet is named after you. It is you. But that would mean you were an individual. Schools don't have rulebooks for individuals. You try to tell them who you are. Even though you have a hard time with their language. You use signs and behaviors to communicate. These behaviors can get you in trouble sometimes. Because they are extreme. You are extreme. You hear people talking about you, and studying you, and questioning you, and reprimanding you. And you practically live in the office.

Nothing makes sense. Most of the time you just want your mom. Hopefully, she's not mad at you for all the things you've done.

Boy with PDD Handcuffed and Charged.

Here is a story about a child with Pervasive Developmental Disorder being handcuffed and charged with assault and various misdemeanors. He's 9.

They were crowding this kid. The behavior he was displaying usually draws a crowd. Crowds make these kids panic. When an autistic kid panics, he can become aggressive. An autistic kid's aggression causes other people to be afraid. Now he is charged with "inducing panic"- which is a felony in his area.

He's not going to "learn to be normal" by being tried in a juvenile court. It's not going to scare him into behaving. You can't spank out a neurological condition. Trying him won't keep it from happening again, and it won't educate a single person about autism. They'll just keep trying to mainstream these kids, and it will be very traumatic for many of them.

The fact is that they can learn, and mature, and grow up to be relatively normal people. Some of these kids will grow up to be extraordinary people. But they have to be helped in a one-on-one way. The schools need to learn this.

School is such a scary place for these kids, and there are more of them every day. My heart goes out to this mom and her son. I know there are people out there who think she's making excuses for her son, but if people could spend a day inside the head of these children, and feel what they do, they would understand. Recess is so hard for them. Sitting still in a chair is torture. Being out of the safe environment of home can send them into a panic that seems so out of proportion to the actual situation. I have said all of the things she's quoted as saying. I just want to send her a hug. I want the world to understand her son, and make a safe private place for him to learn when she has to work.

Tuckaleechee Caverns

Today we took a little field trip. Josie thinks she's a tour guide. A very loud tour guide. " Look everyone! That's a bacon formation. Look! Soda straws! It's cold! Just rub your arms like this and you'll warm up! Hey! Doesn't that look like a cat!? See Smurf Village?! Oh! I'm scared I'm scared I'm scared! That's a big drop! It really is a big drop!" On and on.

Here's me: "Josie, shhh. You can tell her that later. We're not telling stories today. Stay with me. Get off that. Shhh. Jake. Come. Here. Stand here here here. Look at my finger. See where I'm pointing? Just stand next to her for the picture. Here. Here. Good. Whoops, I know. It's slippery. Just get up. No you don't have to cry. Okay, say 'Cheese'."

"Why do I always have to stand on the left?!! Jake always gets the right! OWWWW-WUH! HE PINCHED ME!!!"

"Okay, Josie just stand on the right then. Shhhh. Jake don't pinch. Smile. click!"

I was kind of expecting the tour guide to say "Watch your step here. Okay. Can I have your attention? Up there is what we like to call Smurf Village. What you see here is brimstone. Over there is fire. We like to call this place we're standing the third ring of Hell. If your under ten years old raise your hand. Okay. Here's your red hot poker. Feel free to dance around your parents in a maniacal and menacing way. Parents, don't step too far off the path, that's the fourth ring of Hell down there. It's a four hundred foot drop, and the kids down there drink nothing but caffiene and red food dye."

Afterward we went to a restaraunt in Alcoa and had some great fish. I had half a margarita and then made the waitress take it away. I'll laugh about it later.

August So Far

Well the month is almost over, and I decided to go over the work the kids have done, and list the things we did, and any interesting things that happened on the start of our educational journey. To start, I paid fifty dollars and became a legal private school teacher in Tennessee. That's what I did. Here's a summary of what the kids did:

Josie read 17 books or magazines

Jake read 15 books

Josie got a penpal

Jake wrote a letter to grandma

Josie wrote a letter to some friends and one to grandma

Read 17 chapters of despreaux

Jake did 11 pages of math plus a placement test , has a clear understanding of math concepts for 2nd grade

Josie did 9 pages of math plus a placement test, there were a lot of problems to solve on each page and she handled this well. She has a good understanding of these math concepts (rounding to the nearest 10th, and 100th. Reversing a sum to come up with the difference. Adding and carrying the one) This is review from last year.

Jake has done a handwriting worksheet for every day he didn't write a letter.

Josie is practicing writing in cursive and her handwriting is nice.

We learned about human evolution. We learned about the skeleton, the muscles, the organs. Learned about digestion and the role of the pancreas. Began assembling the Visible Woman. Went to Atlanta to see the body exhibit, viewed black lungs, a baby at all stages of fetal development, handled a rubberized brain, liver and gall bladder. Saw the circulatory system suspended in water.

Played with friends at least three times a week.

Went to Cades Cove, the Cove Park, to the library twice, to the post office where they mailed the letters themselves and purchased stamps from the machine, to the vet twice, learned to sing Love Me Tender, and A Fool Such as I, discovered Josie shares musical taste with her dad, while Jake tends to like the kind of music I do.

Josie designed art for book bags

Jake made up a story and drew a picture to go with it (this is big for him).

They learned to make pizza on their own

Josie captured a cicada killer and fed it grasshoppers. It died. Caught fish in cades cove three weeks ago and of four two are still alive and thriving, oxygenates their water every night by passing it from cup to cup and pouring it back in.

Bought a microscope and learned how to use it.

Mad Libs

For physical education learned the tortoise and the hare, the bear walk, the frog sit, the inchworm, the crab walk, the wheelbarrow, the gorilla walk, and the russian hop from hell. Riding scooters with our friends. Swimming.

Don't get me wrong. We watched a lot of TV, and I surfed the web a lot. We did cut down on the Playstation. But it's just so interesting how much kids do and learn that you miss if you don't keep track. We never sat down and did schoolwork on paper for more than 2 hours at a time. Often we would do worksheets after dinner, and reading at bedtime. They have accomplished all of this in 28 days. Not all of these days were spent "schooling" either. Yep. So far it's working out just fine.

BEWARE!

A little tidbit about my kids. They are allergic to the outdoors. Well, not entirely allergic. They only seem to swell up with the hives and burst into trembling fits of drama if I suggest that they play outside. Today, I demanded that they play outside. I should have had my phone set for the suicide hotline (or the daytime emmy nominating committee), because demanding they play outside poses risks more incredible than I could even imagine.

"Mahahahahmeeee! I don't wahahn't to plaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy on the swihinghinghingset, cause Nellie poohoohoopt by it-uh!"
(So she had to get two bags and clean it up herself.)
"You just wahahant me to bahaahaarf! You haaaattte meeee-uh!"
(Then she cleaned it up.)
She sat next to me bawling. I was telling her that we just had to get outside for a bit, get some vitamin D.
"I Haaaaatttee vitamin D!"
So I launched into one of my little lectures about whining, and learning how to express yourself in a way that will get what you want, and how it's good for kids to get outdoors daily.....
"Mom! Stop Talking! The mosquitos are coming! And they're attracted to CAR-BON-DEE-OX-IDE!"
The kid literally had tears on her neck from crying so hard about having to play outside. I almost fell out of my chair laughing. Such a cruel mama.
Anyway, a minute later a monarch landed on our butterfly bush and all was right with the world. They even ventured outside of the chain link fence to view it and forgot about the war zone they were in. Children are so resilient.

Today's Activities

Today I had Jake do some creative writing for me. He loves Dragonball Z, so I asked him to write me a little something using some of the characters. He sat right down and started drawing and writing. He has some trouble with spacing, and he was under the impression that every time he hit the right margin he was supposed to separate the word with a hyphen. He moved an "s" all by itself to the next line. But notice he did use the apostrophe correctly. Here's the story with mispellings included:

Broly Fighting Goku

Once Broly fought Goku. Broly's gigantic medeor deflected back to Broly by 3 Ka ma ma waves.

Josie drew these designs so that we could print them up on some tote bags. We'll use these to carry library books. Notice the one she made for Jake has "U.S.A." written on the side of the helicopter. She drew that backwards and reversed so that we could print it on to the transfer properly. I did not tell her to do this. I didn't even know what she intended to do with these drawings she made until she told me. Anyway, they both got to iron them on by themselves.

We've been reading Despreaux and the kids really like it. It's kind of dark in some places.

Jake did two pretty difficult pages of math today. He likes to hit himself in the head when he's frustrated, but he laughs when he does this.

So far this week they have completed a lot of work on their visible woman, and read a lot about the human body from our book. We have also played with friends, and Josie tried to ride Rain's bike at OT today. We discovered she still has a lot of hurdles to overcome with balance and knowing where her body is in space.

Carnivores and Pizza

Here's a life skills lesson. The kids made pizza for the family. I tried to stay out of it. I basically just opened the packages for them. I also put them in the oven.

Josie used olives for the crossed eyes and freckles.

This is called a cicada killer. That's really it's common name. It's huge! As big as my thumb. He's dining on a half-dead juicy cricket that came from a connecting compartment. Josie has stocked this compartment with bugs and they travel up a channel only to discover a giant bent on stinging and eating them. Nice, huh? I seem to remember crying about these things as a child. I had a friend Johnny who liked to pull the heads and abdomens off of ants to make little red spiders. This really troubled me. Now my daughter sets up insect death matches and I just think it's so endearing.

I also bought them some carniverous plants and we learned to care for them.



Subjects: One page of math, visible woman (brain and nervous system), handwriting, science (botany), swimming, bike riding, scooter, and played with a friend.

Nanny's Birthday

It was Nanny's birthday today, she turned 87. She got to wear a zinnia behind her ear because she was the guest of honor. She walks with a little cane that has four feet on the end of it so she can keep steady. Josie made this card for her. The flowers "grow" when you push the tabs up through the card. To me it is more than cute. It's that kind of extreme cute that makes me feel a little teary.

Liquids on Planes

I just had a thought while I was reading the story about the crazy woman that caused that plane to be diverted. Isn't urine a liquid? If mixed with an explosive powder would it combust? Could a terrorist blow up an plane this way? Hmmmm.

August 17th

Started with all the exercises. Went to OT, then the park. Jake rode his bike and scooter. Josie just rode her scooter, her bike's too small now. She never rode it either. Waited until after dinner to do math, reading, science. They wrote letters too and mailed them.

Got More Books

National Parks Coloring Book. Very detailed, she's coloring it with pencils. What Happens to a Hamburger, a book about digestion. And Eyewitness Medicine. Just ordered the Human Anatomy Coloring Book. I may end up doing that one instead of surfing the web at night.

Tuesday August 15th

Did a page of math in the workbook. Wrote letters to people (you'll know who you are in a couple of days). Learned about diabetes and the digestive process.

First Tests

I gathered together some practice tests for the kids to do this morning so that I could see where they were academically. They covered spelling, reading comprehension, synonyms, and finding words to fit the context of a sentence. They both flew throught this portion of tests. Jake for grade 2, Josie for grade 3. So I think I'll test them in math skills tomorrow. I believe we can handle most of our language skills through reading in the afternoons, but I want them to know how to take a test. We also covered the process of elimination, going with your first guess, and what is fact and opinion. Side note: we found a spelling mistake in the instructions on Jake's test. Descibe.

MicroBiology

I don't know if I should even tell you what this is. It's not mine, that's for sure. But you can't get between a little girl and her curiousity. My friend "Dharma" brought over her daughter "Rain" and Rain would like to be a biologist someday. We spent the good part of the afternoon playing with the microscope. We looked at fly innards, a mushroom from the yard (it really had things swimming in it), dog hair, a beetle's wing, some fungus, an ant we killed with some mosquito repellant and Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum (cause it seemed stinky and poisonous and she promised she wouldn't lick her fingers), a paper towel, and some spores from a very rotten apple. It was all very enlightening and fun.

Too Many Choices

I can get pretty easily overwhelmed when I'm introduced to too many choices. I get that where- do- I- start feeling. Lately I've been avoiding the grocery store like a plague. If I have to go in, I try to get in and out as fast as I can. I used to think it was because the crowds annoyed me. But I'm beginning to think that I'm more of a corner market sort of girl. I think my Food City could be about one fifth of it's current size and I would be happy. See, if I want Cheerios, I get Cheerios. Usually Honey Nut, or Original. Of course now you can get Triple Berry, Chocolate, Yogurt Burst, Frosted, Multi-Grain, Apple Cinnamon, Berry Burst Strawberry, or Team Cheerios. Or if I think I might like some wheat thins, I get wheat thins. But then in the cracker aisle I look up and wonder, well should I have Low Sodium, Reduced Fat, Harvest Five-Grain, Multi-Grain, Honey Ranch, Big, Baked, or Harvest Garden Vegetable? Don't even get me started in the cookie aisle. Let's just look at Oreos. There's Double Stuff, Fudge Dipped, White Chocolate Dipped, Mint Creme, Coffee and Creme, Mini, Chocolate and Peanut Butter, Uh-Oh, and Reduced Fat. You can also get them in bar form. And how many cereals do we really need? All of the actual food in the store is pushed out around the perimeter, all the aisles are just packed with endless varieties of processed crap. Not sayin' I don't like the flavor of that stuff, but just hearing my kids beg for it makes me insane. "Noooooooooo Mama! I wanted the Mirror Lucky Charms!" "I wanted the Mint Chocolate Chip Pop-Tarts! Not the Fudge Fudge! I don't like the Berry kind!" Blahblahblahblah! Remember what pop tarts used to look like? You had blueberry, cherry, and strawberry. No frosting. You cooked them in the toaster and put butter on them. OOO. Salty and sweet. Anyway, just sayin.

Farook Mahommed's Day Off

Since when have you been able to get 11 people together, on the fly, to ditch class? In a gigantic city that is foreign to you? And miss your flight to Montana to do it? Oh, and risk being deported by the authorities? Wow, these Egyptian college kids really know how to plan a party. I think it must have been number 10 that planned it all. He's got that hunka hunka burnin' look about him. He wanted to do the whole lip-sync- on- the- parade- float thing. Of course they were all pretty bummed when they found out that they couldn't pretend to float 100 stories up in the observation deck at the World Trade Center. Just some things you can't do anymore in New York City.

Update: I want to hear the whole story.

Ultrasounds and Autism

I'm beginning to think that the theory that immunizations may cause autism because of toxic preservatives is flawed because there were toxic preservatives in the vaccines of my generation the previous generation and they don't have the high rates of autism we see in children today. But ulstrasounds are being used way more often now, right?

Anyway, the autistic brain has very poor long distance neural connections, although each individual section of their brain may have many more short connections than a normal brain, which explains the sensory integration problems, and how reason, emotion, touch, coordination, language etc. are not integrated with each other.

A good study would test the rates of ADD, ADHD, and autistic spectrum disorders in children never exposed to ultrasound, and compare it to normal exposure, then to children who were exposed to ultrasound very often.

Here's some information on Sensory Integration Dysfunction to explain why school is so difficult for these kids, and why we go to OT. The article never mentions how children's sensory issues can change daily. For example, some days a kid could be very bothered by crowds and chaos that wouldn't trouble them at all on another. It's very hard to pin down, because it is a very inconsistent condition. I also think the idea of putting your kid in a study carrel in the back of the room with headphones on and eliminating recess and gym sort of defeats the whole purpose of mainstreaming special needs kids for socialization. And if you're going to be alone all day anyway, why school? Or at least, why go to school before you have all the occupational therapies you need to better cope?

Flat Squirrell Part 3

The Visible Woman

Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Science and Stuff

Today we went out to Sevierville in the new Jeep. We went to a hobby store out there because no Knoxville hobby stores seem to have models of animals for Josie to assemble and paint. We didn't find any animals out there either, but I did get a Visible Woman. So we'll put her together soon. We also went to Toys R Us to look for models, found none, but got a microscope for $20. We got it home and looked at rat hairs, fly wings, finger prints made with paint, leaves, and some teeny bug I smooshed.

We also decided that it is time to shave the dog. So I will post pix of that soon.

Science, following directions.

Today's Lessons

Josie's mood improved so much after vigorous exercise. We added some deep breathing, led by Jake, and some stretching. Once again we did the Bear, the Inchworm, the dreaded Russian Hop, the impossible Frog Sit, the Crabwalk, the Ape walk, and the Tortoise and Hare. The only exercise I can't do is the wheelbarrow. I tried Josie on my right foot and Jake on my left. There was a lot of stumbling and hooting, then a big crash.

We studied a bit more about the brain today, especially the associative parts of the brain. They control our language and communication. I talked with them about how a baby's cry really tells us very little, and how good it is that we have language as we get older so that we can express precisely what we need. The associative part of the brain also helps us to communicate our culture to our children. We talked about what centers of the brain we were using while we did our reading and our exercising.

There was also a bit of discussion about why humans are so highly evolved. The book we were reading theorized that humans became so advanced because they had to use their brains to survive in difficult environments like the African savanna. That our brains needed to become more complex in order to craft tools, hunt and find food and protect ourselves from predators. I thought about this a minute and wondered then why so many animals with much smaller brains and bodies as vulnerable as ours have managed to survive for so many millions of years without developing human intelligence. Meerkats, giraffes, zebras, etc. have survived just fine on the savanna without tools or spoken language. I told the kids that we were smart because God made us that way. That we love in a way that animals don't (might be an exception here for dogs, being that they come straight from heaven), that the reason we are so smart is that we're made to share that love. That perhaps we are not animals at all, but something different.

Then we worked on our word searches. It was a very short schooling session today, but I think there will be days that they are open to learning more.

Next week we're going with some friends to Atlanta to see the "Body" exhibit.

Reading and Comprehension, physical education, science, handwriting.

Word Searches

Our OT wants us to work on making word searches. It's a fun way to work on fine motor skills and to help them plan. I'm sure she can tell me all the other reasons why this is a helpful exercise. All I know for sure is that I have a little boy who needs a lot of help in this area.


This is Josie's word search. She made the chart herself. We're supposed to try it without charts.
But it is more complex than what I expected, and she did pretty well.

Jake's word search after I made him a chart to go by. He forgot to put the word "hole" in.

This is Jake's first attempt. Look carefully. Can you find the words "rat", "key", "car", and "hole"? Sheesh.

Now, I am a pretty good portrait artist, which I do believe takes some skills. I can also play the guitar fairly well, and my handwriting is pretty if I do say so myself. When I was 7, I totally sucked in all of these areas, and my parents can attest to all of the milk I spilled and all of the food that had to be cleaned from my shirts. So I think we can cut the boy some slack, if he wants to work on it, he will improve. No one's asking him to design a rollercoaster. thank god.

Moods

I guess I could use this journal to keep track of someone's little mood swings so I know what to expect. Yesterday was an exceptionally good day. Lot's of exercise and play, and schooltime was pleasant . She played with her friends for a good long time in the pool with no conflicts pretending to be a superhero. Today she wants to lay on the floor, and the little tears dripping over her nose. And everybody hates her because she can't do what she wants. So I brush her hair and she doesn't scream. I get the rat's nest out that followed her home from Indiana, so gently. She can play a game on the computer then have lunch. Maybe then we can all pick up where we left off yesterday.

Ratty Yin-Yang

HMMMM

My daughter, who supposedly hates to write so much that they were checking her for dysgraphia, has just done 5 Mad Libs with me, and wrote a three page story poking fun at her brother in her diary. It's all about the "wanting".

Individualized Attention

I think most kids with problems in school just need individual attention, which is understandibly in short supply at any large school.

We started out by doing different exercises. The Bearwalk, the Inchworm, the Crabwalk, the Wheelbarrow, the Russian Hop (OMG I thought I was going to die), the Frog Sit -make sure you put a pillow on the floor in case you fall on your face, you have to balance on just your hands while resting your knees on your elbows( Not for those of us with boobs.)

Next we sat down and learned about the evolution of human teeth, brains, and eyes. They wrote and defined the words stereoscopic, canine, cerebellum, cerebrum, and cortex. Both of them were excited to try writing the words and definitions without my help. Jake did surprisingly well on his spelling. One thing they have a hard time with is spacing their words, so I had them go over each others work and critique it with a red pen. I know, not very "unschooly" but we were having fun with it and they were having a great time showing off for me.

Jake tried to write some of his definitions in cursive, and he got out the dry erase practice board that has all of the cursive letters on it so that he could copy off of that.

Josie had to stop at one point and check to make sure she didn't have a papercut on her nose, which sould have been a disruption in school I'm sure. "Mrs. Teacher! I have a papercut on my nose!!! I have to get some ICE!" Then she would have gotten some kind of mark for disrupting the class, and it would have been written in a little folder for me to sign, then it would have been discussed at an m-team meeting. These little "outbursts" as they liked to call them would happen quite often in a day, so it was very disruptive to the class. We just got her a little ice, then she decided she didn't have a cut after all. After that she sat down and wrote her definitions.

They both decided that they wanted to use their notebooks as diaries. I explained to Jake that a diary was like a private blog on paper. Funny. I had to learn that a blog was like an online diary. So now we will keep our definitions on regular notebook paper and store them in folders.

Handwriting, Science, Journaling, Physical Education

Don't Eat The Stripey Ones

They Sting!

Today's Lessons

2.6 inches average difference. Jake says " it was very cool when I worked on it." He was way off on some measurements, but he got his toe and smile exactly right. His pointer finger and his ear were very close.
He wanted to play with the calculator, so I taught him how to find an average. We did this when we were averaging his measurements. I showed him how a teacher averages a grade, and how a meteorologist averages the temperature and rainfall.
We also learned about the difference between human hands and feet, and lower primate hands and feet, and the difference between the pelvises. We tried to walk like an ape, and learned why it is important that we walk upright (so we can use our hands to create).

Update: forgot to mention that the subjects covered were Math, Science (including a bit of meteorology), handwriting, using a calculator.

Tyrannosaurus Rex- by Jake

Tyrannosaurus Rex. And the instructions. And the box. Picture by Jake (that is me). Mom set up the display.

Subjects: Art, Following Directions, Science, also some keyboarding and uploading pictures onto the web.

What Does This Dream Mean?

I'm in my house and I hear a scratching on the door. I go to investigate and discover a siamese pekignese(sp?) dog. Siamese as in co-joined. I guess then it was more like two dogs. On of the heads had this extra little eye a bit off to the side. Anyway, I let it in and give it some food. Then I decide that it probably belongs to the neighbor remembering that my neighbor has a mutant dog I think and send it back outside. OOOh, but I want to show my mom this weird dog, cause she lives with me I guess, along with a bunch of strange people who are like extras in my dreams. So I show my mom this five-eyed dog thingy, and explain to her that it is probably some incomplete twin thing and what did she think? But the dog wanted to say something. It had this real ghetto voice and it said "YO! All I wants is a place to sleep and eat! I ain't no trouble. I'll just live witchoo. AAhhh-iiiite?" So I let her come in and live with us.

So what do you think?

Homeless Homeschooling

My question is how much money do we really need to spend to educate our children? How much of education is just sharing what we know with our children? Seems like this little girl is really going to grow up knowing how to survive (and thrive) through poverty and hardship.

Mad Libs

Everything is spelled correctly. We like the word dog for a noun. Aardvarks eat dogs in Mad Libs land.

I had never fished before, but my aunt sadly taught me how to bait a hook with a dog....

Subjects: Reading, Handwriting, Grammar

Some Learning

Josie is out of town, but Jake and I did some schoolwork. He said he wanted to do some second grade work today, so I got out the curriculum. We began our book on evolution (which I'm sure isn't part of the Konos curriculum) and wrote down some key words and definitions. Then we began to measure his body. He's estimating the size of his different parts. When we're done with that, we will see what the actual size of things are, and then compare. We will average the estimate, then average the actual, then find the difference. Hopefully Josie will enjoy doing this too.

Subjects: Math, Science, Handwriting, Reading, Spelling, Grammar. All worked on in the course of an hour and a half, and all connected.

Happiness Is.....

My garden.

Happy Guys.

Happy little guy.

Only 95 calories.

Water Dog.

Being Silly.

Josie CSI

"You know, it's a better idea to start a fire in the basement. It will collapse easier that way. If you start it on the top floor, it probably won't burn very much.

Bunny Blogging

Awwwwwwwwwwwww. Jake saved him from grandma's cat. If he can't find his mother, he will have to be bottle fed. I hope this story has a happy ending. So precious.

My Latest Drawing

I thought her hair was so delightful.

Things are Going to Get Pretty Interesting Around Here

So I just got my KONOS curriculum Volume 3. The first part of the curriculum is devoted to the subject of cooperation. The first ten weeks will have us learning about the human body. I think I'm going to need to find a meat processing facility, because I will be needing a brain, a lung, an eye, and a chicken leg. ( Should I purchase a cauldron too? ) There are also assignments where you check levels in your urine, and type your blood. I don't think we'll be doing anything this year where they have to prick their finger though. I also have to find a place where I can purchase certain chemicals. I'll be sure to blog all of it! Did I mention that the kids will have to blow up that lung with a glass tube?

Squirrelblogging

He looks so content broiling in the heat today.

Photograph

Took some really good pictures of the kids today. They turned out great. It was a bit hot though (96?), and Josie took off her shoes and relaxed under a maple tree. Isn't she pretty? Good thing there's no audio to go with this photo.

Cute

"I don't care if your the freakin' leader of the free world! I want my mama! And that goes for Santa and the Easter Bunny too!"

Flat Squirrel

Here's the squirrel that decided our bluebird house would make a good apartment. He chewed the hole so it was big enough for him to fit through. Sometimes he likes to come out and sun himself. Josie calls it "sunbasking".

I Get So Annoyed at the MSM

You never hear the end of the AP racking up the civilian deaths perpetrated by the Isrealis. It's like "Evil Joooooz" is a subliminal message in their middle east stories. " Get out your calculators folks. So far the Isrealis have killed more civilians." Today, that is. It's interesting to me how this article draws graphic mental images of the death a small Lebanese child in this current conflict. Imagine if we lined up the strollers that were viciously and intentionally emptied by suicide bombers over the years. The story also paints Hezbollah's military capabilities as weak and innaccurate. Remember, radical Islamists don't view civilian casualties as collateral damage, or as accidents of war. They weren't innaccurate when they went into Argentina to blow up innocent people in a Jewish center. Or when they blew up that airplane from Panama, and hijacked flight 847. But of course, they did these things on purpose, but radical Islamists are supposed to kidnap, maim, kill, and torture, we expect this from them. See the subtle bigotry? (Middle Easterners are barbarians after all. We should forgive them their animalistic ways, they aren't as capable of waging a fair war.) The Isrealis are not fighting children. ( Wait, I take that back, Hezbollah drafts 14 and 15 year old girls to carry out suicide bombings.) It's like the media wants Isreal to keep quiet and take a second holocaust like good little Jews. Speaking of little, can you find Isreal on that map up there?

Toddler So Ashamed of His Father's Stupidity, He Shoots Him in The Back

Probably a Glock too. I love this from police Sgt. Tim Schmidt "How he got it, we don't know." and "This is tragic. It's a pure accident." Stick to your day job Obi Wan, the Jedi mind tricks aren't working.

Ever Heard of a "Kitler"?

It's a Hitler kitty. And this one is the best! He's even got the hair. One commenter on the site said this particular kitty was okay though, cause he signed a "tweety".

I'm a Private School Teacher Now

They say I'm not considered a homeschooler now in Tennessee, but I am a teacher at a satellite school associated with Home Life Academy. That keeps me within the law and gives me a lot of freedom to choose how to educate my children without state intervention or yearly testing. Another sore spot for me. Once again the state implies that parents are dangerous to children and shouldn't be trusted, while the public school system is infallible. Why would a loving parent who chooses to homeschool let their child fall behind? Who blames the school system when a kid can't pass a test? Anyway, I'm very excited about signing up with this place, since I have to sign up with someone. Here's their website.

Two Pictures Taken on the Same Day

You see that picture of me to the right on the sidebar? That's how I look everyday. You can hear the intake of breath when I enter a room, even if it's empty. There was no photo touch-up, my skin is so translucent I appear to have been photographed through gauze. If you came to my lovely home first thing in the morning, I would not have a hair out of place. I'm just that pretty.

Of course there are times in every woman's life when she gets a picture that looks like it should have a donation box under it.

Please Help.

I Love Nerds and Their Ilk

This article so clearly states so many of my assertions, but I couldn't properly put them into words. And I think the opinions in the article could apply to any person who is considered eccentric or odd in our society. Sure I would like it if my kid didn't have sensory problems or anxieties, and of course I don't want her to get aggressive with other children. But so much of those anxieties and impulses are brought about by people expecting her to function in an environment designed for neurotypical children. So let's fix the environment. Let's cure anxiety. Those things are the disabilities. I like Josie's weirdness. I like the unusual way she has of looking at things. I've even come to appreciate the fact that she doesn't need the approval of adults or other kids for the things she does, and that embarrassment is a word that doesn't exist on her radar. I love how she can't really lie. My daughter understands so many things that most parents would have to keep from children because she doesn't emotionalize them. She's fascinated by animals mating, killing each other, mosquitos drinking her blood, a spider eating a ladybug she kept in a cage for a week. She collects goose feathers at the park and tries to make wings from them, asking me how she can lose enough weight so that the wings will make her fly. She can walk right up to a boy that she liked from school and say "I like you cause you're tall and handsome" then just give him a hug. (It helps a bit that she's gorgeous). My boy seems weird to other children too. He doesn't understand that you speak differently to boys than girls. He can sound a bit gee-golly, like he stepped out of a black and white sitcom and didn't know how to change the dialogue. That is so okay in my family. I think it takes a great amount of courage and honesty to be geeky. I'd venture that you can't find people more true to themselves than you find at a Star-Trek convention, revelling in their roleplaying games and their oddness.

"Pushing" and "Snapping"

Today we did a little role playing so that they could get a better understanding of what they are doing to instigate fights, and how to change in order to prevent them. It seems to me (and some unfortunate teachers along the way) that my childrens' favorite pastimes are getting into fighting matches, or in Jake's case, screaming like the Bride of Frankenstein (with sound added of course) over the smallest perceived infraction. He also takes after me in one particular way. At times I appear to have endless patience while underneath I am just trying to keep from exploding, and eventually I do explode. And since I'm the adult, I must have the willpower to prevent myself from inflicting harm on anybody. Jake's response to aggravation is to first scream at it, then push it, followed by stomping or biting ( he rarely causes any injury, he just runs out of options and doesn't know how to get her attention). Most of the time the aggravation does not go away, since she's usually sitting next to him playing "Spyro", and is delighted by the sensory stimulation all of this yelling and pushing gives her.

So after an incident this morning involving all of the above, I took my kids into the kitchen and did a little role-playing. I told Josie that she couldn't change Jake, that she could just try to stop doing the things that cause him to snap. I told her that she just pushes too much. She asked me "what is pushing." This was fun to perform. I told Jake to stand still while I poked him in the chest and said "Neener neener" over and over. I instructed him to tell me to stop and I would. So he did tell me to stop. Of course I didn't stop. I just poked and poked and neenered until he was a bit angry and confused, he didn't scream or bite me of course, but she got what pushing meant. So I said "See, you push him like that, and then you just won't stop because you're having so much fun aggravating him. Then he snaps." Then she said "but I don't know what you mean by 'snaps'. " This was really fun to perform. I started out very calmly. "Okay Josie, please don't bother your brother anymore. Josie? Do you hear me? Didn't I just say stop it? Josie? DO THAT ONE MORE TIME I'M GONNA TWIST YOUR NOSE OFF YOUR FACE AND MAKE YOU EAT IT!!!" After the laughter subsided, I asked them if they understood how they could change how they were acting, and they said yes. I also told them that I wasn't here to help them resolve all of their fights, and they would have to handle it themselves. If they needed any Neosporin it was in the bottom left-hand drawer in my bathroom by the band-aids.

Right now they are in the basement practicing snapping. They begin by speaking very calmly, then making absurd threats at the top of their lungs. I don't know if they have gathered any conflict-resolution skills from my lecture, but they may have created a new and even more annoying game.

Superman

Bleh.