I'm just so freaking tired of my kids talking talking talking talking when I'm trying to tell them to do something, I could just put duct tape over their non-stop lip-flapping mouths! Or put superglue on their precious little lips and just smash. them. together.
Or I could do what Dharma doeswhen she gets really desperate and get out the broom and spin it around me in a circle and say "Out! Out! Out! OF MY SPACE!" Take that barking dog with you too! AND Get A JOB! But they wouldn't hear me because they keep talking talking talking.
Now, if you tell them to be quiet (with extreme prejudice) they start to cry. Then it's just crying crying crying. You can only stand the spray of your own spittle so much as you shush them for the fourty-seventh time in three minutes. Oh and they never hear you when they're crying.
Oh goodness! Now the dog is barking barking barking. I need a drink.
Once I get past the aluminum wonderbra, and the makeup, I so hear what this lady is saying. She must be a mother. God help her.
I'm just venting here. No actual children or animals were harmed in the making of this post, or even shushed, believe it or not.
On a good note, my niece just informed us that she is ready to babysit now. She may have a down payment on a home of her own by the years' end.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Yesterday, I was staring out of my kitchen window willing myself the peace of the bird resting on a branch in the front yard while inside I was under complete chattering house arrest. The non-stop talk followed me everywhere and I was wondering how much longer I could take it before enacting the wild fantasy that kept placing itself between me and that bird.
I checked your blog and read this timely message of love, compassion and 80s wisdom. Thank you for another laugh. And the next time you feel like you need a drink by 2pm in the day, call me. I'll join you.
We're like Yin and Yang aren't we?
Post a Comment