The Kitchen's Done!

Here's a "before" shot. It was really not such a bad kitchen, but me and white have a big problem with each other. Mainly, white likes to be clean. I also can't stand melamine because it delaminates when something steamy sits beneath it, and if water gets on the toe kicks they warp and buckle. That's what was going on here.

Another thing is that our house is loaded with pretty woods: hardwood floors and cherry window surrounds. A white kitchen like this seemed like an afterthought. So since we're going to live in this house until we die of old age, we figured we would fix it the way we like it.

Here it is!

Whew. We won't be doing that again.

New Picture

Since my daughter told me I looked like a rock star in this picture, I decided to add it to my profile.

Dear Husband,

I guess you can see the laundry is still on the pool table, but I have a very good reason today that has nothing to do with reading blogs, emails and magazines. It has nothing to do with worrying over my kids' education either.

I got up this morning and fed the kids and got Jake to do a page of math. After that, I went out and cleaned the dog poop out of the back yard.

The grass was very high so I mowed it first on the highest setting, then I mowed again with a lower setting. I got out the leaf blower and blew all the grass and debris off the driveway, sideporch, and basketball porch.

Then I moved the dishwasher over to the corner of the side porch because we are only closet Tennesseans, and I'm too damn lazy to put it on the front porch anyway. I gathered all of the sticks and put them in the fire pit, and took the grill cover round to the trash.

Did you know how mildewy the swingset is? Well, I put tilex all over it and scrubbed it real good, just in case anybody ever decides they want to use it. Then I cleaned the floor of the screened in porch with the push broom and the hose.

Then it was noon, so I knew the kids needed to eat. We went to McDonald's, then we went to the post office to pick up boxes to send our soldier stuff. Oh, I forgot, before that we went to the comic book store and let the owner pick out a stack of comics that he thought the soldiers would like. After the post office, we did some grocery shopping.

When we got home, and after I put the groceries away, I moved some of the dishes that were crowding our downstairs bar up to the kitchen since we will have a sink up there tonight. Yay! I also picked the living room up.

Anyway, I just wanted to tell you why our room is so messy and the pool table is still covered with clothes, and ask you what you wanted for dinner. Oh, and I'm afraid I won't be performing the dance of the seven veils tonight. I hope you understand.

Love,
Your Sweetie

P.S. The air in my left side back tire is low.

Carnival of Homeschooling

The Carnival's up.

I don't know how many of my homeschooling homies read this, but it's weekly. It's not just homeschoolers talking about why they're homeschoolers, which I like.

Rest in Peace Petey

Rats are greatly under-appreciated as pets, but our family really loved this little guy. I think he loved us too. Yesterday we were holding him and feeding him from a spoon because he was too weak to get up on his hind legs and eat with his own "hands". After he was done eating, he washed his face, kind of laying on his side as we pet him. Then he groomed my hands too, just to make sure I was clean.

At a potluck last night, a lady was cutting flowers in the kitchen to be put in the church sanctuary. She gave me a clipping from her forsythia to take home. As we pulled in, we picked a spot to plant it on the side of the house. This morning, we buried our little friend in that spot, and planted the forsythia there too.

Josie Tickling Petey the Rat

How Do Kids Like This Go to School?

Ate breakfast. Did a math page. Then read them the fable "Fox's Snack".

Jake wanted to act it out. Josie didn't. I sent Jake upstairs to get a bag for a prop. Then Josie decided she wanted to play. We used an afghan for the bag.

First Jake was the fox, I was the lady of the house, and Josie was all the other characters. The dog acted the part of the dog in the story. You should have seen her all wrapped up in the afghan, struggling to get out and "eat" the "fox". Next we played it so that Jake got to be all of the other characters in the story.

After that, Josie wanted to write Part Two of the story. So she paced all around the room while I wrote what she dictated. She added a cat to the story. Four pages later, I asked if she wanted to draw a picture for part 2. She said she didn't. So I did. At that point she thought drawing a picture was a grand idea, and drew two, embellishing the story a bit while she doodled. She went upstairs to take a shower, and Jake asked if he could write Part Three. He dictated three pages to me and then he illustrated his story.

Whew. This was about 3 hours of narrating, writing, reading, drawing, acting, reciting, and dictation, with a little math thrown in.

A school teacher would have to get past the fact that my daughter says "no" to something. Just begin doing it anyway, and she'll join in. A teacher would have to accept that my kids dislike writing at this time. No way I would ever expect her to sit down and take dictation. A teacher would have to let my kid put another kid in a bag and attack them in order to act out a story! Heaven forbid! Running in the classroom? No way. Would I want them to do any of these things in a real classroom situation? Never.

So, did they far exceed their former public school's and my own expectations of them today? Yep. Am I proud of them and hopeful? Yes indeedy.

So Far, Today Rocks.

It's 12:23.

The kids are dressed.

Their rooms are cleaned.

The rat cage is clean.

The banana orange smoothie recipe has been made.

Breakfast was eaten.

The "Tower of Babel" was told.

Story questions were answered.

Drawings were made (did you know the tower had window boxes with flowers? Me neither.)

Summaries were written in cursive by both children. Jake wrote an especially long paragraph.

Josie ran upstairs. "What are you doing, Josie?".... "I had to finish cleaning my room!"

No whining, fighting, or complaining.

KNOCK. ON. WOOD.

Josie's Evangelism

"Mama, did you hear about the fish that plays soccer?!"

"Nuh-uh!"

"Yes! There really is a Koi fish that plays soccer!"

"That can't be true."

"Yes, Mama." (She opens her Ask magazine.) "Let me read about him to you so that you can believe!"

Desperado

Listen.


Here's the CD.

Think You're Overworked?

I was looking up pictures of Burros for my kids. There was one in the storybook we were reading and they weren't sure what they looked like. We came across this picture, and they wanted me to blog it. Poor thing.

Kitchen Update

It's been 10 weeks since the cabinets came. They spent five weeks as strange furniture in my living room. They've been halfway installed in my kitchen for another five weeks while we wait for countertops. The countertops have arrived at the installers. They are being inspected. Monday they will call to set up an installation date.

I don't know if I will jump for joy when my kitchen is finished. I think I will just be glad it's finally over.

Of course I will invite my friends over for cocktails (or tea) and hor d'ouvres when I'm better acquainted with my new kitchen, and relearn how to cook.

I'll post photos soon of the whole process.

That Video Down There and Some More Ramblings About Gender My Husband is Sick Of

That video down there is by a band called Mika. I heard them on the local radio station and thought it was Queen. This got me thinking about Freddie Mercury and his quite palatable gayness. Except for the short-shorts. But that's just bad taste for any man, you can almost give him the gay pass for it. I would be more troubled by a straight man in short shorts than I would be around a gay man in short shorts. Could you imagine some guy in aerobics wear hitting on you at a bar? I can feel the Killian's Irish Red coming out my nose just thinking about it. Otherwise Freddie Mercury's gayness was just part of the entertainment, and he pulled it off in a fairly masculine way compared to some.

Strangely enough I will admit that Tim Curry was oddly alluring in Rocky Horror Picture Show. I wouldn't say he was palatable because the character was a bit disconcerting as well. Sex itself was a bit troubling to the teenage me who went to the movie with my sister. (Add to that the whole Rocky Horror Virgin thing, made me wish I had a fake ID, and some clue about how to mix something that would knock me out.) Anyway, he sure could sing in that corset, with the garter belts, and the fishnets.

Rock is full of androgeny. Robert Palmer, Roger Daltry (bee-ooo-tee-ful), Adam Ant, Duran Duran, Mik Jagger, David Bowie....I could go on and on. Girls fell all over themselves for these lovely guys with puffy shirts and ribbons in their hair. What is that all about? You know the straight guys did it because the girls loved it. Girls buy records. Girls fueled the whole Rock and Roll industry. As the music got harder sounding, the boys seemed to get softer looking. It's some Rock n' Roll sexual conspiracy I think. Someone in the industry got the whole psychology of attraction figured out. I don't really think women want to emasculate men, but maybe women want to see a little of themselves up there on stage with the testosterone.

None of this offers me any clue as to why I have a problem with female drummers.

P.S. I know I misspelled "Freddie" on that post. But heaven help me, this HTML bullcrap won't let me change anything. Well, so what your image of me as perfection incarnate has been a bit sullied?

Freddy Returns

Cute Letter to a Soldier

My little boy spent some good time on this letter. He tells where he's from and a little about himself. He took special care to separate his words so that they could be read. I love the picture he drew to go along with the letter. It's a "find silly things" drawing. The tree has lost a tooth. Has a soldier flying out of it, a "firefly" buzzing around it, and a superhero acorn with a cape and "zippy lines" trailing behind it as it flies from the tree. There is some gum, a tennis ball, and an airplane in the tree too.

A soldier on the other side of the world will read this letter from my kid.

Let it Be

That phrase has a few meanings. Let it happen... Leave it alone... Amen.

This morning I just let us be. I try to do this often, but I get afraid that things will go undone and my kids will deteriorate intellectually, if I don't monkey with them. In the winter I monkey a lot with worksheets, assignments, and activities. Now that it's getting springy I'm letting it be a bit.

It's funny what happens. This morning Jake came downstairs to tell me that I really am good at drawing, and that all the portraits I have on the walls are nice. I told him that when I was his age I took an interest in drawing. It was something I practiced all the time because I enjoyed it. At this point he picked up his recorder that he's been playing all week and asked me if I could find a place to put it that the dog wouldn't chew on it.

I asked him if he wanted to find some recorder music online to listen to. We went online and found "That Bach song. DOO-DOO-DOOO........." It's Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring I told him. I discovered a few really simple and sublime pieces by Bach like Minuet in G, and officially changed my mind about him being the Eddie Van Halen of classical music. You know the guitar show off with too many notes.

Later this morning we went outside and burned some yard junk. While he was blowing on a stick to get the fire started up, he asked me what a pun was. That's a fine question for a 7 year old to ask, huh? I told him I'd let him know when we heard one, but they're used a lot in knock knock jokes.

Finding your joy, Bach, building a proper fire, and puns. All before lunch. Because I let it be. Amen.

One Woman and a Shovel

This little corner in our landscaping was just busted up red rock. I think it was supposed to look like lava rock, but it just wasn't pretty.

This morning I decided to look up how to build a frog pond. To build a frog pond you just need a dig a very shallow space that you fill with lilies and water. Eventually the little froggies move in.

We had heard a rumor that some former owners had a frog pond here and filled it in because it got too loud. This corner is right in front of what was a little girl's room, so I can imagine it bothered her. Now, my little girl is in that room and she is not bothered in the least by the sound of frogs, the feel of frogs, or their taste when she kisses them on the lips. Right now she has some bullfrog tadpoles that she collected at the grand's, so maybe they can live in there when the water's right.

I am so digressing.

I started digging at 8am. By about 9:30 I began to discover some huge river rocks under there. By 10 when Ray came out to see me he said "Wouldn't it be funny if you dug up the old pond?" By 10:15, I was finding stones in patterns of circles with spaces beneath them that I could shine a flashlight into.

I don't think it was a frog pond that they dumped all those stones into. It's deep and wide enough to be a koi pond.

I'm not finished pulling out stones, but I may need a pain reliever, and I definitely need a shower.

It's funny how I never seem to have the energy to carry the folded laundry up the stairs, but get me curious about something, and there's no end to the heavy labor I will do to get to the bottom of it.

Oh,Deer.

It's very interesting what my dog can find to play with on the Grandparents' property. Yep, there's a hoof on the end of that. I don't know where the leg's previous owner is, but I have a feeling he's not getting around much anymore.

Speaking of Feng Shui

Apparently the wisdom center of my living room is a shoe closet. Guess I need to get me some smarter pairs.

More Than I Thought They Could Handle

Yesterday my mother called at about 1:00 to tell me to turn on Sundance Channel and see these little boys in Africa doing some kind of routine involving dumbbells. Well, I missed it, but I left the TV on that channel, and left to clean my room. I popped in and saw that Josie was watching a sub titled program about illegal immigrants called "Wetback". It showed young people from Central America who were trying to cross into Mexico. Touching on police brutality, the dangers of jumping trains, rampant urban crime and gangs.

Of course it was Sundance, so the sympathy was for the illegal immigrants, some that crossed the Rio Grande at the end, and we talked about that sympathy, and how important it is to be compassionate to people who suffer. We also talked about how these people were breaking the law, and that sometimes laws seem harsh, but they are there to protect us. I told her some of the bad people who were hurting the good people in Mexico and Central America can come over our border too, so that's why our border patrol sends people back. The program was favorable to our border patrol, showed them to be respectful to the people they detain, as opposed to the Mexican police who beat and robbed two of the immigrants in the documentary.

Anyway, I was shocked she sat through the whole thing and really took it in.

Later some friends came over and we watched the show about Oprah's school for girls in South Africa. I'm not sure any of the kids understood the significance of the school to the little girls, or how those girls suffered in their own lives. We were trying to make the point to our children that they should appreciate their blessings. When you have a daughter who breaks into tears because you tell her it's time to go to the grocery store, you need a bit of ammuniton too. Maybe the show will marinate in their subconcious for a while and come out in a couple of years when they're developmentally able to understand it.

I went to Blockbuster and picked up "The Prestige" and we all watched it. Yes, Grandparents, the children sat through the whole thing. I'm certain they didn't get all the plot twists (I sure didn't), but afterwards Jake was talking his head off about electricity. He was a little outraged at one point during the movie asserting that "Magic is not real!" When it was apparent some real magic had occured.

I never expect my kids to have any attention span. That's unfortunate for them, because if I whittle down their education to suit what I believe they can handle, then it's like I'm spoonfeeding them. That's starving my children.

P.S. Dharma's coming over today to help me Feng Shui my house. I've been reading a book, and apparently I'm cutting the Chi's all over the place.

Don't Look Down!

Thought this was a cute little picture of my daughter and her current choice of reading materials. Notice the front says "Don't Look Down!". Just a clever warning that she might just be a girl.

"Ann Overboard!"

As a "conservative", for lack at the moment for a more appropriate word, I have to make the admission that we often crawl all over ourselves to prove to our "liberal" friends that we're nice people, who care for animals, plant trees, love our gay cousin Fred, drive a hybrid etc. Crap! I've even worn through a pair of Birkenstocks! Oh, the shame! (I won't get into the fact right now that I do not believe there are very many dyed in the wool liberals or conservatives out there. Most of us are individuals, and if we sit down long enough find that we agree on most fundamental things and just go about getting those things in a different way).

Anyway, sometime in the past 20 years or so the party of Abolition, Suffrage, and Civil Rights got tired of apologizing for itself and letting the other side define us, and started slinging the mud in the opposite direction. I don't know if this is a wise way to fight this war of ideologies, but some of that mudslinging is funny. Unless someone who speaks for me, starts slinging the really dirty kind of mud, and it gets on me, and I try to wash it off, and it leaves a stain, and I think people see it, you get what I mean.

Most humor comes from pointing out everyday people's little hypocrisies. Like the fact that the same people who are always demanding tolerance for other religious beliefs love to drive around with little fish with legs on their bumper. I think it's cute in a way, but it is hypocritical, why not wrap a pork rind around the star of David while you're at it? Oh, wait, that would be anti-semitic, and not really very funny. Sorry.

This is where Ann Coulter comes in. I guess she decided somewhere along the way to expose the hypocrisy of those who decry "First Amendment, First Amendment!" every time someone wants to do something rude and offensive to traditional folks, and then turn around and demand you go to rehab whe you say something that offends them. So she said something really rude. And not funny. So Ann yelled "Faggot" in a crowded theater, and some people got really bruised up trying to be the first one to the exit door. I'm sure it was entertaining to her. She loves this kind of controversy. Watching someone have a cardiac infarction over a the utterance of a word is usually high-comedy.

She's been making it her business for a while to throw verbal pies at her opponents. And for a while it was hi-larious. In the meantime she made some excellent points too. And her sharp wit is matched by no one. But this week she threw a real shit-pie and she knew what it was when she baked it up, this wasn't a gaffe, botched joke, or faux pas, she intentionally tossed that pie out there, and it got on everybody. I don't want that stuff on me.

She also gave the opposition ammunition for about 2800 news cycles, and I'm going to have to listen to that too.

One thing that's nice about the Republican Party (and at the moment there aren't very many nice things I can say), is that when somebody in the party says something "not funny", we generally condemn it. See Trent Lott, who was just confused IMHO. We don't have republicans in the Senate that were Klan wizards (Byrd), or folks who let their girlfriend drown in four feet of water because they were worried about their political future, and then have the nerve to buy a Portuguese water rescue dog and name him "Splash" (Kennedy). We have a few buffoons on our side, but you generally find that they are widely scolded for their buffoonery, and the media reports it, and they get on TV and apologize for it etc.

See the nice thing about the First Amendment, is that although it gives you the right to say any damn thing you want, it doesn't give you freedom from censure.

I don't think she should apologize to me. But I certainly won't defend her for what she said. She has the right to think it and say it. But she's not speaking for me anymore. I have the right to walk away any time I please, and as soon as my fellow denouncers manage to cram their way through the exit doors and come out like ground beef on the other end, I will be right behind.

On Vanishing

It's pretty late right now, but I don't think I'll be able to sleep if I don't journal my thinking a bit. And I thought maybe the things I'm thinking about will be beneficial to others, so I'll just put it out there on this little blog.

Lately, I've been sensing that something in me is vanishing. I've been getting the sense that I've neglected a part of me that I used to nourish before marriage and family and the unconventional choices I've made surrounding my children. I also have regrets about all the things I didn't finish or pursue; like my degree, a career, my art, my singing. I've been scared that there's a part of me that never really grew and it's already beginning to die.

So I've been saying to myself that I should never stop learning and striving. I should keep searching for that place where that part of me can continue to live. At the end of my life, I should be proud of how I lived, I should have found the answers, had some success and somebody should have something to say about me, otherwise what's the point?

That made sense to me, but at this moment I'm having a little epiphany.

What if tomorrow I couldn't sing? Well, lots of people can't sing and get along just fine. Singing is really a small thing after all, and I feel that there are a few musical family members that have passed who would forgive me for that sentiment. Why? Because there are so many ways to communicate love, and hopes and dreams besides singing. I'm not a bird after all. I'm a person with the power of speech.

What if tomorrow I couldn't speak? Thankfully, I write pretty well. I'm good at conveying emotions on paper, and getting my needs met would be easy if I had someone in range of my paper airplanes.

I'm also very good at drawing. I could make money that way. I already have done that. I draw people's children mainly. We all want to see someone we love all mapped out in pencil. There's something touching about it. That's why I do it.

But what if I lost the use of my hands and could no longer write, draw, work or speak? You know what my first worry would be? How could I let my family know I love them? That I'm so glad I'm not alone?

If I couldn't speak or sing or write or draw (or blog) I would still exist. I wouldn't vanish. You know why? Because I have my family. I have a husband who would still talk to me, even if I couldn't speak. I have children that would be close to me even if I couldn't chase them down. I have friends that would stick around even if I wasn't cracking them up. I know a few who have been there when I wasn't so funny.

See, the reason I want to sing, is to sing to somebody. I could sing to strangers, which I enjoy, and they can go home and forget me. I would have some attention. I would have a hobby. I would have a little thing that energizes me. Is writing a song for my husband less worthwhile? It's certainly not "blogworthy". Neither is writing a letter to my son and putting it in the mailbox for him to find, or drawing a blue jay for my daughter to put on her wall. It wouldn't matter to a lot of people. But it would sure matter a lot to the people that matter to me.

I've been so busy playing that nasty tape of fantasy, shame and regret to really tune in to the world around me, and I have been vanishing. I haven't been talking or listening or engaged. "What?" That's been my word lately. It's like I've been in a dream.

And tonight I had a moment when I realized something that seems so true about life, and helps keep things in perspective.

If I fell down at the end of it all because I had exhausted myself finding ways to feed my ego, at the expense of those who loved me, nothing I had ever done would make sense, because I never completely imprinted myself on anyone's heart, that's when I would truly vanish.

All Out of Whack

This past couple of months I've been walking around confused in my house and it's really starting to get to me.

In December we decided to replace our kiitchen countertops, appliances, and cabinets. Things moved along pretty smoothly and we received our cabinets on January 12th. The first cabinet out of the box was damaged, and the installers wouldn't begin until all of the cabinets were at the site, so we would have to have cabinets sitting all around our living room for about 3 more weeks. The actual install of the cabinets happened on February 9th. Not all the cabinets though. They couldn't hang the corner wall cabinets or anything attached to them until after the countertops were installed.

The Silestone guys came to measure around the 11th of February. After the template is made, it takes about 3 or 4 weeks to get your countertops installed. About 10 days after the man came out to make the template, the store called to tell me I owed $62 and the countertops would not be made until overages were paid. Okay. So the install date on the countertops is March 15th.

In the meantime we have been going up and down the stairs to make dinner and do the dishes. Ray gave in and temporarily installed the cooktop, but we have no kitchen sink right now. We do have a tiny one in the basement, which we have been using.

All of this is very inconvenient.

I don't believe in quantum physics at the moment, but I do think there is some merit to this Feng Shui thing. My toilets aren't working right, our computer is acting up, our printer/scanner has stopped working and my camera is falling apart. There's a strange smell in my daughter's room that I can't locate to clean. Lately, my dog has been running off when we open the door to let her in. The roomba keeps shutting down at weird times. And I'm tired tired tired.

I know. Somewhere there's a baby in Darfur crying for me.

I'm moving my couch tomorrow. Wish me luck.

What?

Hey all my homeschooling homies! Apparently our parental authority to educate as we please is being undermined again! Isn't this infringing on our freedom to assemble?

ATTACK ON HOME SCHOOL GROUPS In the last week we have had a rush of complaints from home school organizations from across the state. Home schools traditionally produce some of the best and brightest kids who achieve high results in the real world. As you may or may not know home school students are starting to team up and are becoming a more powerful group. They are starting to come together and do things like start sports teams and clubs that meet and interact with other more traditional students. Some home school groups and students have also been meeting in churches and Sunday school classrooms to get specialized teaching by a specialist in a common field of interest. An example might be a group of ten or fifteen home school students gathering together to hear a presentation or be taught about nuclear science from a nuclear scientist from Oak Ridge. I did a discussion one day about how our state government works for a similar group. Lately though these groups have come under attack. Codes inspectors have begun to shut these groups down in mass. The reason given is that when they meet they become "a school" and the churches and Sunday school class rooms that they meet in don't meet code for schools. Forget that these same rooms are much more packed every Sunday for church or Sunday school classes. Expect to hear more about this as time progresses. posted by TheRep @ 8:56 AM

This is from Rep. Stacey Campfield's blog.