They Got Him

Johnia Berry's murderer has been nabbed.

The composite sketch is the most accurate one I've ever seen. Her roommate had a good memory. The only thing off a bit are the brows. Brows make a big difference in a face, but the composite is very close anyway.

One of the Best Songs Ever

This is a shower song of mine. The water droplets and I cry together when I sing it.




I love how Paul Simon plays the whole guitar, and how the guitar and the voice are so bountiful in their simplicity. The songbook I have doesn't show the chords I see him playing in the video, but that's probably because most of us morons who went out and bought the songbook, are ...well.... morons. At least compared to Paul Simon.

Laser Treatments Can Scar You

Wow, this article could have been written about me, except that I had my scar-i-fying laser treatments done in a medical office.

Time

16 years ago I was 18 and I posed for a picture in my new orange dress that I just finished sewing from a vintage pattern. Due to the mirroring effect, and the fact that this post is about me me me, you don't see my boyfriend of the time in the picture. He's posing with a blue velvet jacket and a pipe. Two years after this photo was taken, I gave the dress away to that same boyfriend's new love (and his wife today). It looked stunning on her. I had no idea at the time that it looked so stunning on me. *Sigh* 16 years ago, I was 18. 16 years from now, I will be 50.

Ladies, we are younger today than we will ever be. If you haven't done so yet, find an orange dress, some red tights and a kick ass platinum blonde wig and get your picture taken. And don't waste your time in front of the mirror.

Funny Picture

This is my highly flexible son when he was about 8 months old. See how the foot on the right is turned? Sheesh. He walked very late. I think it was because he was too rubbery to hold himself up.

I think this photo looks like someone just threw some doll parts in a car seat with a towel and took a picture.

(If you've had a baby on a long road trip, you know what the towel's for.)

Pastel Painting

I told my hairstylist when he asked me to do a color portrait for him, that I don't do color, I only draw with pencils in black and white. I've always had a problem working with colors. The image either gets too muddy or facial features get blurred out and undefined. But when he handed me the photo of his wife and daughter on the beach, I couldn't imagine how it could be done in graphite. So I bought some pastelboard and pulled out my colors and this is what happened. This is the first painting I've ever completed without it ending up in the trash. I think I'll send off for it to be printed on some art paper.

I had my friends Beth and Tony come over, and I pretended that I was having a little reception for my new painting, but it was more of a grill out. Tony took photos of my painting with a very nice digital camera, and I am very thankful, because all of the images seemed like keepers.

Here's the same piece of art through a tungsten filter. It seems like cheating having it printed after it's been digitally altered. But anyway, whatever. I think it's prettier through the filter. What do you think?

Windows

Ever had something glaringly obvious hit you in the face and wonder how you ever could have missed it? I had that experience two days ago. The kids and I were sitting around the table and Jake (a.k.a Captain Obvious Life Sportscaster) said, "I can feel the wind coming through the window."

BING!

Josie and I, in unison, said "Huh. Wind! Window!"

Is the word "window" a simplified version of "wind door"?

I've been around windows my whole life. I've opened them mainly to let the wind in, but strangely I've always thought of them as light sources, and air sources, but never "wind" sources, otherwise I would have made the connection.

Sorry to My Loyal Fan(s?)

I haven't posted anything worth much, but you should see the other creative endeavors in which I am endeavoring to be creative.

I'll post the art when I'm done.

Big Numbers and A Seal.

The kids were arguing about the population of the United States, New York, Tennessee, and the world this morning, so we consulted to oracle for the numbers.

The population of New York City alone outstrips the population of all of Tennessee by approx 2.2 million people.

I said to them, "Take all of Tennessee, cram it into one city and add another 2 million people to that." Josie, in all of her linguistic glory, exclaimed "Wow! New York is so overpopulated! It's like the locusts infesting the savanna!"

I really had no idea how large New York City really was. I did have a clue that the state of Tennessee still has many wide open spaces when I flew over it last week. Which reminds me, I'm supposed to blog my Florida trip.

Here's a cute photo of a seal I got.

"Yes, I know, everybody tells me how cute I am."

(He needs a better caption if anyone has any ideas.)

In 1980 I Had a Turntable.

I was going through all the vinyl in the basement closet. Hubby's Souxsie and the Banshees, Cure, Shriekback, etc...my Air Supply (or my sister's I guess), Duran Duran, Cyndi Lauper etc.... I found my Chipmunk Punk! I loved this album when I was little. When I was 7, I was hearing some of these songs for the first time, like "Good Girls Don't", sung by animated chipmunks. I still hear Alvin when I hear that song and I giggle a bit.

It's not actually punk, but that rhymes with "chipmunk". Here are the tracks:

Let's Go- R. Ocasek
Good Girls Don't- D. Fieger
How Do I Make You- B. Steinberg
Refugee-T. Petty
Frustrated- that D. Feiger dude again
Call Me- D. Harry
You May Be Right- B. Joel
Crazy Little Thing Called Love- F. Mercury
My Sherona- once again, Feiger.

I'm going to go on an audio tour of the net and see if I can't dredge one of these up.

Here's a commercial for it.

More on That Study. Or That Study for Morons. Whichever.

Scott Adams picked up on the "Conservatives are Stupid" study on his Dilbertblog. Yes I did get a kick out of it. I love some of the comments. One person remarked on the study where subjects were supposed to type an "M" or "W" quickly and concluded that the reason that libs did so well on the challenge was that liberals must play more video games than conservatives. Whether true or not, his conclusion seems more logical than the psychologists'. But that's my problem, I'm too logical. I am a conservative, and therefore I have no mental gauge for nuance.

Hat Tip: Dad

Great Autism Video

I love this song too. Watch it all the way to the end.





My kid may have to conduct all of her mega corporate business meetings from beneath the conference table in a cardboard box, but with 1 in 160 dealing with this stuff I expect to see inflatable under desk "conference boxes" equipped with noise canceling headphones in our future.

I Should Get a Special Parking Place

Conservatism is a psychological disability. It's true, cause I read it on Yahoo news.

So an assistant professor of psychology at NYU who has spent the last few years dedicated to the study of prejudice and the neurology of guilt and racism has hooked a whole 43 people up to electrodes in order to study their brains during a simulated driving test. From this small study the conclusion has been reached that while liberals are adaptable and flexible towards different ways of thinking, conservatives are neurologically stunted and have only habitual reactions to new situations. The article closes with the suggestion that with "experience", "rigid" conservatives' neurology can change and they can overcome their disability and grow into good "nimble-minded" liberal progressives. I mean, you'd be crazy to want it the other way around. Who would want to move from being an enlightened liberal to become a stunted and ignorant conservative.

Nature Neuroscience published the study, and the MSM ate it up. In this study of 43 people, half the American population is painted as intolerant to differences and unable to adapt to change, while hanging on desperately to old ideals. The irony is the left-wing political myopia of the MSM and Nature Neuroscience that without question buy this sort of liberal supremacist swill and call it science. Do I detect the very kind of prejudice here that the "tolerant" and "freedom-loving" left claims to abhor?

Based upon my own scientific study, my hypothesis is that liberal elite will soon declare conservatism as political insanity and send us off to a soviet style Gulag for shock treatments and insulin therapy. Maybe this hypothesis is born of a fear of people who think differently. Perhaps I need to find a few subjects and hook them up to EEG's and put them through a driving test just to be sure.

See my post on conservatives and dreams for more psychological enlightenment.

Update: Another study of conservative retardation from yesterday. Via Ace o' Spades.

Update 2: It's a different part of the study I'm referencing.

Yeah Yeah!

I ask any of my literary friends to tell me of the significance of the tomato in this video.

My husband,who detests tomatoes, contends that the first tomato grew on the Tree of Knowledge. Eve ate a bite then handed it to Adam. Subsequently they were banished from the Garden of Eden. Because of human sin, God gave tomatoes poison leaves and made them to grow low to the ground like a serpent. He also made them taste really bad. He likes marinara, but asserts that the sin-e-cine has been removed in processing, so they're kosher. Anybody who knows hubby knows the story of the "Devil's Dingleberry", he preaches it like he's on a street corner.

Anyway, at the beginning of the song "Love Stinks" (on vinyl), J. Geils tells the story of the Garden of Eden. Then there's this absurd mystery tomato in the video.

Is hubby's theory widely held?

Shoop Shoop Diddle-Liddle-Lit!

From the days when people danced to happy stuff.

More Color

Drawing from a photo, then scanned, then printed on art paper, colorized with pastel pencils, scanned again, run through a filter. I guess you would say it's mixed media.

I'm seriously considering sending it to this online printer I like to use. They will stretch it on canvas and I can paint it a bit.

I have a tendency to overdo things, but this way I don't run through the paper.

Stay tuned. I'll be messing with the Jake hair picture next.

Highly Creative Day

I keep recycling this image, but I really like it. So call me vain, I don't care.

I can't believe how many steps I've gone through with this thing. My portraits lately have been a real marriage of good old fashioned drawing, and high tech gadgetry.

First I took a photo, then I drew a portrait using that photo as a guide, then I took a photo of the portrait. I downloaded the image from my Nikon Coolpix and used Paint Shop Pro and put a hot wax coating on the image. That was a few months ago. Today I decided to print that image on some art paper and colorize it with some pastels and pencils. Then I scanned that image in and pumped up the colors. Here's what you get.

What's really funny is that the camera I used is in the photo. So is a rearview mirror. I keep using this portrait which is a photo of myself taking a picture of myself to make a portrait of myself. I've even photographed the portait of myself taking a photo. Scanned it too.

I'm not sure if I'm a good advertisement for caffeine.

Color Pet Portrait

My Nellie

Holy Meltdown Batman!

To all of my dear friends who witnessed the disturbing events that transpired today...

I would like to let you know that, after my kid called your kids terrible names, called you terrible names, and called me everything in the book besides patient, loving, beffudled mother, and after a harrowing road trip home with me trying to keep my chin up while this verbal abuse went on, and laughing through my tears as (God! You won't even believe this!) Beat on the Brat by the Ramones was playing on the radio....

We called the chiropractor and the child's vertebrae have been adjusted so that her head turns in a normal fashion, instead of fully rotating.

We called the gastroenterologist and the green pea soup has been pumped from her stomach.

We called the surgeon and the blue bucket has finally been removed from her grasp.

We called a bible camp teacher by the name of Linda, who is the finest exorcist Concord Christian School could find and she informed us that although the devil is still working hard on our child, a few rounds of "May the Circle Be Unbroken" and some minor child abuse should nip it in the bud.

We called the podiatrist and he recommended she wear size 13 men's shoes from now on, which will serve to prevent her from running too fast and having to be corralled by two heat exhausted mothers again.

We called the zoo, told them our story, and asked for some small primate tranquilizer darts. They are sending them Federal Express.

We called on the doctor and told him Focalin probably wasn't the most calming of medicines for this particular child.

Well, we really just called a family meeting on the kitchen floor for a deadly serious lecture to the child, that ended up with her remorseful and tearful little head on Daddy's shoulder. She managed to hiccup out, "I do all of the things a bad friend does. Sometimes I feel guilty about me."

And well, a sad as that sounds, I think that can be called a good thing today.

It's the End of Me

Remember that movie Like Water For Chocolate? If they made a movie for me, it would be Like Homer For Doughnuts. Well, Dunkin Donuts is removing all trans fats from their doughnuts. All I need is one more excuse to eat a Dunkin Donut. As you recall, I had an earlier post about a year back. I'll let you scroll through my archives and find it. You should get to know me better anyway. I'm really a lot of fun.