She..... (ahem)...... Sings.

This may look like a roller derby post, and this afternoon, I thought that this evening would end with one. As you know, I love to attend the roller derby when it's in town, since I have some homeschool homies that participate, and they deserve loud praise. I also have some friends from the "way back days" who now I find in the roller realm.

One of those wayback friends knows me as a singer. And I am. But today I am an extremely talented shower singer. Every water droplet sends me waves of applause as I belt out vocals to the glass doors at least once a day.

It used to be that I was a singer for people. That was many years ago. Without fear, I could get up in front of a crowd, put on a big smile, and sing just about anything. I always had the anxiety that comes with excitement, that optimistic feeling that I would do well and they would like me. Then somewhere along the line I dropped the delusions of grandeur, had a couple of kids (one that was particularly troubled by my singing voice for a time), and took up grumbling, barking, declaring, lecturing and praising. I also have an obsession with seeking that elusive animal called silence.

Tonight one of my wayback friends came up to tell me that the person that was supposed to sing "The Star Spangled Banner" was a no show and would I please sing it? I said yes, naturally I would sing, it had only been more than a decade of course, and it was only a notoriously difficult song, and those weren't water droplets out there. I asked her if vomiting was allowed on the rink, to which she replied "no". She showed me to a room where I could warm up for 3 minutes (or vomit, I'm not sure). So I had a hair's breath of time to get adjusted to the fact that I was singing, then adjust to the fact that it was the freaking "Star Spangled Banner", then to find myself a starting note so I would be able to hit freeeeeeeeeeeeeee in a more or less respectable manner.

3 minutes later, I was holding myself up by grasping the edge of the counter in the "soundbox", holding the mic like it was some kind of limb to keep me from falling to my death, and I quiveringly squeaked out our nation's anthem. My voice broke once. It failed a bit in the middle. But I did hit freeeeeeeeeeeeeee. It was all done in the same breathy way I sang "Over the Rainbow" when I was eleven.

Thing is, I sang the "Star Spangled Banner" in the shower recently, and I really impressed myself. It helped that I was prepared for the audience, I knew them well. My sweet little droplets.

After the show there was a knot in my stomach like I hadn't felt since the night I downed two Guinness and a shepherd's pie then took a flight from Boston that experienced engine failure after hitting a flock of birds.

After sitting with a dear friend who attempted to calm me down, I ran into another wayback friend, who is a musician, and the hubby of the other wayback friend that got me tonight's "gig". He fortunately missed my stellar performance. He asked me if I was still singing, I told him I sang tonight and sadly he missed it. Other than that I hadn't sung in public for about 12 years. Then I did something really surprising in light of the fainting episode I had just narrowly avoided. I told him I would love to sing again. (?????) He knew a few people who could help out in that department and we started talking about doing some music.

I came home a bit wired, and sat down to check my email. Another old friend had written me, telling me to learn some Blondie, which would somehow earn me a fine brew at a future show. Yeah, I'll Gitcha if I don't have an anxiety attack first, baby.

(By the way, I would love to sing the national anthem again. I mean that without the sarcasm that the previous paragraphs may lead you to believe is there. Just give me a few weeks prep time with my droplets though. Then I'll tear the house down.)

On the derby end of things:

I would say the ladies played hard, it was a good game, et cetera, but I spent most of my time socializing, so that would be insincere. Next time I'll watch the bout. I do want to say that the Icearium is a great venue, although the crowd seemed a bit more tame than the other roller rink. There seems to be a lot less cheering and involvement from the people. Maybe it's the bright lights that inhibit the rowdiness. I missed that. The bar area was classy looking with a good beer or two on tap. The bathrooms were clean. The floor of the rink was strange. It was made of a rubber mat-type material that was designed in a repeating pattern of tiny octagonal holes. I think it would be a very bad place to lose your lunch. There would have to be special equipment to clean it.